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Why wed?

It took us a long time to come to the decision to get married, far longer than it took us to decide that we were deeply and seriously committed to each other and our relationship. What finally turned the old argument of "we're just as capable of living our lives without an official marriage," to "we should get married" wasn't a single experience, or even a specific need, it was the slow realization that we missed the experience of deciding with our friends and family that we were committed. This wedding is the outcome of that realization, one in which we, Meg & Ry, ask you, our family & friends, to join us in a collaborative community process: making a family.

We've thought long & hard about how to run our wedding, both its ceremonial and celebratory aspects, because we've been trying to find ways to integrate all of you into the day in meaningful ways. Both of us are thrilled to be able to gather so many of the people we love and admire in one room, and your presence and participation in the formalization of our relationship will be the greatest gift either of us could imagine from you. We're hoping to include small collaborative aspects throughout the day to both honor you, and to fuel us. These aspects may include a Quaker-style wedding certificate, signed by all the guests, the joint creation of our ceremony's focal space, or displays of our community's skills in art, music, performance, and more throughout the reception.

We have an incredible bounty of love in our lives, both of us have parents who love each other madly after more than 30 years, incredibly close families whom we are lucky enough to see often, friends we've known for decades, years, months, and weeks, and more. Both of us grew up & live in a world of role models for relationships, where even the ones that don't last are honest, respectful, and caring, but most endure. We often joke how rare and funny it is that we both have hyphenated last names, but how much more rare and special is it for us both to have such role models for long-lasting loving relationships in our parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and friends?

© The Hyphens, 2007